Never Settle For Less!

By Thomas Clark

Making decisions of all kinds can be challenging, especially when it comes to the New York scene. Fast-paced, precise, logical and always on your toes are some must have characteristics needed in your biological make-up. When it comes to dating and relationships knowing what you’re looking for in a mate is better than just going for whatever comes your way.

Since when did having standards become a bad thing? Having too many can be a setup for failure. Let’s face it, truth be told no one is perfect. However, having precise standards establishes a guide for everyday life and conditions. From work to everyday life having some type of standard keeps things in order. The thought of being single does strike fear in the heart of most individuals.  However, making those unsettling compromises just to have someone special in your life can be the worst move of all.

This next activity may sound sooooo high school but it’s a true test of where your standards fall. You can do this alone or with some close friends. Make a list of what you want in a mate and put down everything that comes to mind. In this process be sure to really think about what are the “hardcore-can’t-get-around-standards” and those that can be compromised.

Review your list and rate your standards, are they too high or too low?  Honesty is KEY to answering this question. Self-awareness is a corner stone for most endeavors in life. When it comes to finding the individual to that is meant for you, knowing where your standards are is a start. Remember, if you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything!!!

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Adam Lambert Covers the Advocate

By Melvin Browne

Adam Lambert pompously covers The Advocate November Issue. In the piece, titled “Reinventing Adam Lambert,” the singer details the songs on his upcoming album due spring of 2012. Adam details to Advocate editors that his new creation will be more personal with a “Nine Inch Nails meets George Michael” vibe, “I know that’s a weird mash-up, but that’s what it feels like”. “I think it’s going to let people underneath my facade a little bit — a self-created and totally admitted facade. I’m trying to convey to my audience that you really can’t judge a book by its cover, and there’s more to the universe than you can see with your eyes. It’s like existential pop.”

Adam stated his attitude about his place as a gay cultural figure, eventually asking: “Where’s there balance for me? I’m a musician and I’m writing music. I’m also becoming more involved sociopolitically, I’m getting involved with the Trevor Project and Equality California — these are things that I really do care about. But I do want to maintain a balance. What am I going to be known for in 15 years? I want to be known for my music, that’s my art.” Check Out the Photos from A Day in the Gay America!

Wedding Season Ideas For Your Good Girlfriend…

By Chef LoveJones

Many of us deal with the same issues that surround wedding planning and its festivities.  When chosen to be the main artery for your bestie’s wedding bliss, one can become quite ‘stressed the hell out!’ The key thing for partners that are exercising their nuptials is to be creative, interactive and making it fun. Yes!  This will be your own Cooking Class amongst friends.  In addition, this will help your honoree make new and delicious dishes to enhance their new union.

As a Chef, I have had great success with Recipe Wedding/Civil Union Showers.  Here is a list of helpful tips to plan the best shower possible:

  1. Collect food ideas (Small Bites, Dinner Entrees, Fine Dessert or Cakes) from person getting married.
  2. Locate a venue
  3. Select Theme a date
  4. Select a small event committee
  5. Select invited guests
  6. Create an invitation that will allow each guest to attach their recipe for the party with RSVP date
  7. Choose best recipes to for group participation
  8. Create a book that will house recipes as a gift to the person you are having the shower for.
  9. Additional gift items should come from housewares stores (i.e. Crate & Barrel, Sur Le Table, Le Crueset, Home Goods, Tuesday Morning, etc.)

Great Tips …

Wedding Bells after Don’t Ask Don’t Tell’s END!

By Stephfon Guidry

A Groom, an Officer and a Gentleman…

14,000! Approximately that many men and women serving our country in 1993, under the Bill Clinton administration lost their jobs as military servicemen to “Don’t Ask Don’t tell”. As of September 20, 2011, DADT has officially been repealed. “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” was a policy created by the Defense Department that mandated that no openly homosexual servicemen were enlisted and sexual orientation was not discussed for enrollment in military duty. Silence, seemed such a powerful government policy for almost a decade and now in 2011 as states vote for and against same-sex marriage DADT is now repealed.

Don’t Ask Don’t Tell Repeal sparks many celebrations. Military men are becoming married men or at least planning on it as the repeal on DADT goes into effect. “It’s a reminder that — as broken as Washington is and as long as change can take — people and organizations can do amazing things when they work together and never waver from the vision that unites them,” Jim Messina. Campaign Manager, Obama for America.  President Barrack H. Obama promotes positive change in his campaign and as election season comes with his repeal of DADT.

Don’t Ask Don’t Tell may be gone but the war is not over now in the coming days, weeks, and months it’s time for many of these closeted Military men and women to find the courage to be open. As there is more visibility and voice from military personnel there will be more of permanence to the repeal. Because as CNN.com writes, “Though repeal of DADT was won, there are Americans, specifically some GOP presidential candidates, who would reinstate it”.

Now that gay military personnel can be visible, in my view, they should be. In short, with “Don’t ask, Don’t tell” gone, it’s time to tell.” As the doubts roll in on who will come out of the closet, many military personnel have already taken bold steps like a 25-year-old Air Force officer, named Lt. Joshua David Seefried. Lt. Joshua David Seefried took his muted voice, as DADT was still in effect, and began Outserve, the underground network for gay military personnel. In lieu of the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, Lt. Joshua David Seefried updates his Facebook to reflect his sexual orientation and boldly stated, “Those are things I feel like I should do because I guess that is what a leader would do. If we all stay in the closet and don’t act brave, then the next generation won’t have any progress” Know that change is something that takes time, needs dedication, and requires tenacity thanks to many military men and women of all sexual orientations protecting our freedoms and rights I can say it gets better!

“Tyler and Me: A Day I Will Never Forget” – By Nelson Morales Jr.

Nelson Morales Jr., Rutger’s University Student and 2011 Summer intern youth blogger for the GET DOWN PSA and Campaign, shares a personal reflection on the Tyler Clementi tragedy one year later in his article entitled “Tyler and Me: A Day I Will Never Forget”. On September 22, 2010, Nelson was gearing up to celebrate life on his birthday, while a fellow Rutger’s student Tyler chose to end his. Nelson and Tyler will forever share September 22, a day that Nelson will always remember.

GET DOWN is the edgy HIV/AIDS public service announcement campaign that frankly portrays sexually active teens/youth of various sexual identities, who are experimenting with multiple sexual partners, and the consequences they deal with as a result. The GET DOWN PSA BLOG is where people of all ages and backgrounds can share stories, opinions, facts and “newsy bits” about HIV/AIDS related topics in an effort to encourage healthy, productive and positive dialogue and maintain heightened awareness. The GET DOWN PSA BLOG cover not just HIV/AIDS and safe sex, but sexual behavior, identity and the issues here and abroad that affect these areas. Our supporters include Dawn Richard (Dirty Money) and DeMarco Majors (LOGO’s Shirts and Skins) who both starred in the PSA’s.

Here is an Excerpt from Nelson Morales Jr’s Blog Article. For the full Article please Visit the GET DOWN PSA BLOG.

On September 22nd, 2010, I celebrated my 20th birthday while a student at Rutgers University. I sat in my dorm room sorting through the birthday comments I had received on Facebook and doing my Spanish homework. However, what I didn’t realize was that on that same day, first-year Rutgers University student, Tyler Clementi, would take his own life by jumping off of the George Washington Bridge.

During the following week, I saw several Facebook posts from other Rutgers students that there were news reports about a sex tape that was recorded in a Rutgers dorm. I didn’t think much of it; “probably some dumb freshman” was my thought. But in the next couple of days the local and national media started to converge into Rutgers creating a media frenzy and the story started to come to light. The name Tyler Clementi started to appear in the papers and newscasts along with Dharun Ravi and Molly Wei.

The reported story was that Ravi set up a video camera in his room (Tyler Clementi and Dharun Ravi were roommates) and captured Tyler having sex with another guy. The video was apparently streamed online via Molly Wei’s room and promoted on Ravi’s twitter account. It was reported that Tyler felt that he was being bullied because of his sexuality and spoke about the situation with his resident assistant, through the university (Rutgers Housing and possibly through RUPD), and online via a message board from the website Just Us Boys.

My guess is that Tyler was seeking help on his situation but decided to take his own life for the fear that everyone would know he’s gay. One week after my birthday, on September 29th, the police found Tyler’s body north of the George Washington Bridge where he apparently jumped to his death. His death shook the campus and received worldwide attention. I myself was interviewed on WCBS 880 AM, PIX 11, and Telemundo about his death.

What made this case hit so close to home was the fact that the dorm that Ravi and Molly videotaped Tyler in was right across from where I was living. When I was in my afternoon class, I stumbled upon an article from MyCentralJersey.com that stated that the filming incident was recorded in Davidson Hall. I lived in Winkler hall my junior year, which is right across from Davidson residential hall. My friends and I just couldn’t believe it the incident happened on our campus, right next to us. I was surprised that a story that received worldwide attention developed across the street from where I lived……. Click Here for Full Article

Morales, Jr. N. (2011, September 20). “Tyler and Me: A Day I Will Never Forget”. Retrieved from GET DOWN PSA BLOG.

NYC PrideFest 2010

 

The March

The March began as an annual civil rights demonstration beginning the year after the Stonewall Riots in 1970. Over the years its purpose has broadened to include recognition of the fight against AIDS and to remember those we have lost to the illness, violence and neglect. It has also evolved to include being a celebration of our lives and our community.

Sunday, June 27, 2010  –  12:00PM – 5:00PM
Step-Off @ Noon | Formation Area/Step-Off @ 36th & 5th
March Route Map

This event is free and open to the public. No tickets are necessary.

 

The PrideFest

PrideFest is the annual LGBT street fair. PrideFest seeks to bring together local residents and families, community leaders, and area business owners to celebrate in the street. Additionally, we expect to attract thousands of out-of-state visitors and volunteers. This will be the 18th annual PrideFest event. We will continue to combine vendors, entertainers, and community activities for a day of fun celebration of LGBT Pride in the name of equality.

Sunday, June 27th, 2010  -   11:00 AM – 7:00 PM
Hudson St. between Abingdon Sq. & West 14th St.
Festival Map

This event is free and open to the public. No tickets are necessary.

 

The Dance On the Pier 24

The Dance on the Pier was born out of a time when LGBT persons could not dance openly and proudly together. It is a protest set to music, a celebration set to the western skyline and a reminder of how far we’ve come.
 

All proceeds from the Dance on the Pier benefit New York City’s LGBT Pride Week events and community organizations.

 

Pier 54, 13th St @ the West Side Highway – Hudson River Park
Sunday, June 27th, 2010, 4:00 – 10:30 PM, Fireworks

Opening DJ: Steven Oliveri
Closing DJ’s: Freemasons (Loaded UK)

Tickets NOW Available:
May 1- 31 – $50, June 1-26 $75, Door $100, VIP Passes $150

Village Apothecary – 346 Bleeker St. – 212-807-7566
Wear Me Out – 353 West 47th St.- 212-333-3047
Steel Gym – 146 West 23rd St. – 212-352-9876
Mark Nelson – 237 West 20th St. – Marknelson.biz
Box Office Tickets – Boxofficetickets.com – 800-494-8497

 

 

Happy Gay Pride from HomoCouture!!!